The Sky for Us

Big Fishes' Carnival at The Lake - The Sky for Us

Another story, you say?

Well, you do miss out a lot of interesting stories, even though I have told you hundreds of mine. Oh, I know! How about the story of our little girl who longs for the sky? It all started the night you went away, the night our little girl was about to learn about life. We were walking down the narrow street - you know, the one spanning across the rice field that links our village and the city. With gentle wind that is as if going to take you slowly to the beautiful clear sky, and the crops soothingly sway, beckoning us to play with them, how could you not remember? What a relaxing place it was.


Our little girl kept asking about you, dear. Your little angel told me that you would take her to the sky one day, instead of leaving her behind. I guess that's a promise that you could never fulfill. So I tell her that you would be staying at the sky from then on, watching over us. To my surprise, she only pouted as she usually did when you leave for work, even though I tried to tell her that you would be there for a very, very long time. She kept pouting about how you always left her behind without notice. Eh? Ahahaha, my bad, darling.

The next day I was about to walk her to school as usual, but she insisted on walking by herself, saying that she's already grown up and stuff. Realizing how fast she grew, I could not help but smile and send her off with a 'be careful on the road'. Yet as much of a worrywart I was, I ended up following her from a distance, watching her trip to school. Stalker? That's mean of you, dear. Are you saying you wouldn't do the same in such a situation?

Anyways, when we arrived at the sky that I told her you were at, she took a moment to sit under the apple tree, where you guys usually spend time together. But the sight of her sitting under the light streaming through the trees without you invoked as much loneliness as the comfort when she was with you. It crushed my heart to know that such will be the only sight I'll ever see again under the apple tree, but what happened next surprised me.

"Papa, are you there?" she said as she stared at the cloudy sky. Yes, dear, she started a soliloquy. She then started having a conversation by myself - or with you, I guess. She began asking the questions that she always asked - when would you be back? How much did you like the sky? and she naturally talked even though the cloudy, darkening sky gave no answer. Was she late for her school? Well if I had let her go I'm pretty sure she would have been. Let me finish the story, darling, and would you please not pay attention to trivial details like that?

I was pretty sure that I was about to burst into tears, but what she did next sealed the deal for that. She took out her lunch box, opened it, and extended her arms while holding the lunch box. She was offering it to the sky - to you, dear. When not even a sandwich disappears from the box after a while, the sky began to rumble and it started pouring. She dropped her lunch box and started crying, both hands covering her eyes and her long hair let down in front of her lowered head. I ran to her and held her tight, tears flowing down my eyes all the same. Among the chaos of the falling rain, she screamed "I know, mama. I know he's dead."

Yeah, dear. She knew all along. She was much more mature than I expected then.

After that, she spent a lot of time sitting under that tree, usually after her school finished or later in the night. She walked there and back all by herself, and when she took such a long time to come back home, I decided to pick her up from school, and caught her doing the same thing again. Only this time, she didn't cry. She just stared blankly at her lunch box after nobody took her sandwich. This happens everyday, and as much as I wanted to be by her side, I know that the place would only be for you. As I watch her trying to be with you everyday, she slowly deteriorated. That means worsened, silly! She stopped offering the lunch boxes after a while, and then she stopped laughing to you and asking you questions, and finally she stopped greeting you when she arrived there. All that was left was her staring blankly at the sky. Why do I follow her everyday? Isn't it obvious, dear? Don't tease me like that!

For quite a long period of time she became unmotivated, or lifeless if you want to take it extremely. She was never really excited about the special beef steak that I occasionally made, seemingly tried to look thrilled when I took her places during her holiday. It was hard for me too, dear. There was this one time when she fell and hurt herself in the amusement park, and she didn't even cry. She just sat still, her blank eyes stared at the wound, and I was the one to do all the worrying and wailing. Yet when I was about to give up hope, the sky showed me that a hardened heart can always be softened.

It was as usual - she was sitting under the apple tree when the sun was about to set. She stared blankly at you, when this particular little boy showed up. "Do you like the sky?" he asked out little girl. He insisted on talking to her even though she hardly gave a reply. He said he also liked the sky. He said whether it is the cloud or the star, the sun or the rain, he liked it all the same. He kept coming every day, and his persistence made her answer after a while. After that, it was just like two children playing together under the tree, although it was obvious which of the children was more energetic. Nevertheless our little girl started talking to me about him, telling me about what he said and what they played. Perhaps to this day, she never noticed that I was always watching?

After that, our little girl cheered up and was back to her normal, smiling angel that we knew and loved. Every day she would come to sit under the tree, and he would be there. They would spend time together then, either playing around or just sitting next to each other enjoying the sky. Why did all the boys get to sit with her there, I wonder. A boyfriend? Darling, she was eight when this happened, I wouldn't let her have something like that! He was just a special friend that is always with her when she look at the sky. She said that was the sky for you, but now isn't it more appropriate to call it the sky for us?

That wasn't the end of the story, dear, but I'm afraid we don't have time for the rest just yet. For now, let's go back to the garden and do what we're supposed to do: patiently wait for her to come here herself.